It's been seven years.

Dear Katie,

Seven years ago my heart stopped beating, but the world kept moving. You were there growing under my heart, and then you weren't. I am forever broken.

I sat there on the beach that day staring out to sea. Trying to will your little spirit to where ever your daddy was. Hoping for a minute you could be with him too. I sat in the cold sand numb, and trying hard not to fall apart. I remember letting the cold grains of sand run through my fingers just so I could focus on something other then the crushing emptiness inside of me. I left a big part of myself right there. A part that I will never get back.

You would be seven this year. You would be in first grade, all happy and pink and obsessed with Barbie like I was. You would have lived in six different houses, in six different towns. You have a little brother, who has no idea that he is your little brother. I watch him play and wonder if you would have looked like him. If you would have had blonde hair and blue eyes too.

Seven years later I still miss you. My heart is still breaking. A little less than it used to but this time of year my heart shatters all over again. I'm writing this to you so you know you’re missed, and loved.

I will always love you my baby.